Bowels

28 Jan

So Dr Terry Bowley (pictured here with the big sign and the sloppy tie / top button on shirt combo) would like to know if we’ve all experienced changes in our bowel habit in the last three weeks.

This is our Government’s attempt to pick up early bowel cancers because the earlier they’re found and treated, the better the long-term outlook. This makes perfect sense of course – but three weeks? The National Cancer Referral Guidelines suggest six weeks – which seems to make more sense: after all, you need only a bout of diarrhoea (after a night on the town followed by one of those delicious kebab things which has been revolving at almost exactly 37 °C for the last two days) to have three weeks of soft and runny stools.

Never one to shy away from health-related issues, I will join in with the fun faecal facts and consider letting Dr Bowley know about my 20 years’ worth of altered bowels given my propensity to the joy which is anxiety-provoked irritable bowel syndrome. Indeed, if Mr Lansley gets his way and the [heavily slashed] NHS budget is given to GPs to spend I reckon we’ll all need Terry’s number on speed dial.

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